I SPENT 7 DAYS CHATTING AND FROLICKING IN THE COSTA RICAN SURF WITH IRENE WITHOUT EVER NOTICING SHE WAS MISSING THE TIP OF HER RIGHT RING FINGER.
It wasn’t until after she had left the Surf With Amigas Retreat in Costa Rica that I heard her story, when the topic of fingers and leashes came up in our weekly classroom session. An amiga described her way of navigating a board through the whitewash, “a wrapping motion, directing the board by the leash.” Later on, this inspired a lively discussion amongst our crew of female surf instructors about the perils of the leash, while also revealing the story of Irene’s accident.
What follows is Irene’s recount of that experience and how it has influenced her, in surfing and in life:
It was 2012, I was 32 at the time and I was in Taiwan doing a Traditional Chinese Medicine Internship in the city of Tai Chung. After hearing about the waves in Taiwan, I arrived and instantly started searching for surf spots. I found a spot called Fulong Beach, about 3 hours away from where I was staying by train. After contacting some friends, I decided to join them on a trip there that weekend, arriving a day before to give myself time to explore.
When I arrived to I found a surf shop that also served as a hostel. I booked a room and met the owners, a cute newlywed Taiwanese couple. I went to sleep and put my alarm early for a dawn patrol session.
I rented a longboard that morning and headed out to the beach bright and early. I don’t remember much about that first session, but I remember being happy. I spent the rest of the day on the beach doing yoga and also rented a bike to explore. When the afternoon came I was already exhausted, but knew I only had two days to surf. I wanted to commit to surfing as much as I could, because I had to be back in the hospital for my TCM internship on Monday.
I decided to rent the longest, heaviest board so that I didn’t have to paddle much. As I was entering the ocean, the swell started to pick up, and the whitewash felt stronger. I was walking in, passing the waves by grabbing the nose of my board and through the whitewash. Suddenly a wave took my board, so I pulled it back using the leash. When I turned another wave was already coming, and I didn’t have time to turn the board around so I decided to pass through it by grabbing the tail. I put my hand on the tail with my right ring finger next to the rope string that attaches to the leash.
When the wave came I passed through it by pushing my hand on the tail. With the weight of the wave, the board, and me pulling in the opposite direction, the rope string amputated the tip of my right ring finger. I initially felt like the board had hit my hand, a strong slap. I didn’t think much of it, assuming it was just another bruise. But when I brought my hand to the surface, I saw that I was missing the tip of my finger. I was in shock, it was surreal.
The first thought that came to mind, was: “Ok, don’t panic, you need to get out of the water and control the bleeding.” I walked out of the water and the pain started to hit me. I started to scream, “FUUUUUUCK”, over and over again, feeling the shock, the trauma, the pain, the loss. I remember people were staring at me, feeling uncomfortable with my screams. I didn’t give a fuck. I continued to allow the trauma to move through my body and express it how I needed in that moment. I screamed, “HELP”, and shortly after the lifeguard appeared. He was a young Taiwanese man, I could see he was very inexperienced. He stared at me in shock. I tried to signal to him that he needed to call the ambulance and to help me stop the bleeding. He did nothing.
IN THAT MOMENT, I KNEW I HAD TO TAKE CARE OF THIS MYSELF.
I put my t-shirt around my forearm and tightened it up like a tourniquet. After, I walked to the surf shop where the Taiwanese couple were. When they saw me, they instantly called the ambulance and were very supportive. I put my finger under running water to clean it from the ocean and sand. That’s when I felt the most pain. It was excruciating. I covered it again with clean towels, keeping my arm raised to help stop the bleeding and went into the ambulance that had arrived. The Taiwanese surf couple drove behind me to the hospital.
In the ambulance, I was panicking. But soon came the knowledge of all the spiritual practices I had done in my life. I thought, “I have so many tools, now is the time to use them.” I started doing pranayama (breath work) and mantra repetition (like prayer). When I was focused on this, the pain went away. When I saw my finger again and was immersed in the experience of losing a body part, the pain came back. This was a beautiful realization of how potent our mind is, and how our breath is such powerful tool to relieve pain and stay in the present moment. Calming the nervous system allowed me to stay grounded. It was an incredible teaching moment.
When I arrived to the hospital, the Taiwanese couple stayed with me to help translate what the doctors had to say. I was very lucky. The plastic surgeon who only comes once a month happened to be there that day, and he was able to save my distal knuckle. This might not seem like much, but it gives me a little pad and more mobility of my finger. I am eternally grateful for that. When the surgery was finished, the Taiwanese couple payed for my hospital bills and had called someone from my TCM internship to come be with me. Lisa, a Vancouverite from Taiwanese heritage, went to the same TCM school in Vancouver with me. We were never friends, but she came anyways to be at my side. I will always be grateful for the generosity, kindness, and support shown to me by Lisa and the Taiwanese couple during this time.
After landing back in Taipei, Lisa’s dad came to pick us up from the airport and take us to Lisa’s aunt’s apartment. Her aunt received me with a home-cooked meal of chichek soup, full of heart medicine and herbs. After that I went to my small apartment in Taichung to heal.
I experienced PTSD symptoms for about a month, then slowly but surely they went away. I received lots of support from people in the hospital and neighbors all around. I felt like little angels where appearing right and left to give me love. I was alone but never alone. The great mother was taking care of me through the kind acts of strangers. Taiwanese folk will forever have a very special place in my heart because of this experience.
MY FIRST SURF AFTER THE ACCIDENT WAS A YEAR LATER.
I surfed without a leash in Pacific Beach, San Diego. I had a great session and saw dolphins. It was amazing. My brother was pierced by a sting ray that same day, but that is another story. After that, I continued to surfed on and off until 5 years ago, when I moved to Tofino in Vancouver Island, BC. After the move I really started surfing more consistently. It was a perfect environment for me- since I had use a wetsuit and gloves, I felt protected and confident.
Surfing is one of my passions in life, and I will be a surfer forever. But this experience definitely changed my relationship to surfing. Now I am more aware of the danger of the board. I don’t feel as carefree as I did when I started surfing. Even though I know I have the ability to do certain maneuvers and go for more critical waves, I psyche myself out because of fear [of the accident].
There is so much I still need to work on, but I am very proud of myself for sticking with surfing and not allowing fear to take my bliss away. Now, 10 years later, I can’t imagine my life without surfing and I am grateful for everything that I have learned through this beautiful journey of life. I’m grateful for the medicine of the ocean and for all the beautiful people I meet through this life transforming spiritual practice that is surfing!
MY ADVICE TO OTHERS WOULD BE:
Keep your hands away from the tail! Cultivate deep belly breaths, those will keep you calm in difficult situations! Keep following your bliss! Keep searching for that perfect wave! Keep your heart open to new experiences and new people, you never know what life will gift you with!! May you be safe, happy and free! Namaste.
WE’RE BACK AGAIN TO CATCH UP WITH MORE ALUMNI AMIGAS THAT YOU MAY KNOW!
THIS MONTH WE’RE CHATTING Q+A STYLE WITH our friend grace who has joined swa retreats with the main goal being to reconnect with herself and to make new connections with others. STAY TUNED FOR MONTHLY STORIES AND UPDATES FROM OUR GOOD FRIENDS ACROSS THE GLOBE.
Q: Think back to when you attended your first SWA retreat. Why did you book that trip? What was that first retreat experience like for you?
I had actually been researching surf retreats and was ready to reserve a spot with a different group in Dominical area. I asked my friend, Jaime if she was interested in joining me and found that for the exact same week she had already reserved with SWA – so she suggested I tag along with her! Best decision ever!
Q: Now that you’ve been on several SWA retreats, what keeps you coming back?
Holly and her wonderful staff, the awesome women I have met, the great knowledge shared in the clinics/lectures, feeling of community and FUN times! I had lost my connection to surfing for a few years with life happening… the goal for the Costa Rica retreat was to reconnect, which definitely happened. I wasn’t even half way through Costa Rica retreat yet and booked Morocco! The Morocco holistic retreat that I joined took that further and I’m finally feeling like ME again… it’s been a long time and it feels great!
We’re back again to catch up with more alumni amigas that you may know!
this month we’re chatting Q+A style with mother, surfer, and world traveler danielle gustafson to learn more about the why behind her surf journey + a bit about her personal retreat experiences. Stay tuned for monthly stories and updates from our good friends across the globe.
Q: Think back to when you attended your first SWA retreat. Why did you book that trip? What was that first retreat experience like for you?
A: I’ve been obsessed with surfing for 20 years, but I never committed. I was a white wash wahine. As my kids got older and started shredding, I recognized that I had to learn to surf or lose them to their passion. My main motivation to finally commit was to keep a connection with them. It only made sense to send myself to SWA. That was four and a half years ago. I had no idea it would change the course of my life in the best possible ways.
Q: Now that you’ve been on several SWA retreats, what keeps you coming back?
A: I can’t get enough. Every retreat has been epic. I gift myself at least one a year. Hey, I invest in my kids’ summer camp, tutoring and sports development. Why wouldn’t I offer myself the same level of self-care?
We’re catching up with alumni amigas that you may have met on your retreat!
Stay tuned for more stories and updates from our good friends across the globe.
Q: Think back to when you attended your first SWA retreat. Why did you book that trip? What was that first retreat experience like for you?
A: I grew up in Florida, consistently around water. It has always kept me grounded and makes me feel at home. I learned to surf in college. It became my new passion and joy in my 20’s. I traveled and surfed after college and had the time of my life. While traveling I met my husband. We fell in love and had two boys. My boys changed my life. I became “mom” which was the greatest gift but my priorities were no longer surfing and traveling… life was all about raising them and working. I lost a little bit of who I was during that time and there came a point where I needed to get that back. That’s when I discovered SWA. I was nervous to travel alone again but as soon as I did it I felt alive! The girls at SWA immediately encouraged me to get out in the water. They made me feel comfortable surfing again and it was exhilarating!!
Surfing is like riding a bike in some sense but it can be scary to get back out there after a long hiatus, especially when you are alone. With SWA you are never alone. You always have a crew cheering you on. My soul was on fire again and I felt like I was no longer just “mom”, I was Roni. The girl who loves surfing, music, travel and adventure. The retreat only got better from there…I met some of the most interesting and inspiring women, ate excellent food, did yoga, went lava boarding (a first for me) and much more. The entire retreat was well organized and there was never a dull moment. I felt completely fulfilled when I returned home and could not wait for my next SWA experience!
Q: Now that you’ve been on several SWA retreats, what keeps you coming back?
A: These girls know waves! They know exactly what the tides will be, when to go out and where to go. I don’t even have to think about what board to use. They are so on it! It’s such a comforting feeling going out to a new break and having them guide you to the exact spot to sit to catch the best wave. They also know where it will be less crowded and where not to go. I seriously have the best time surfing with SWA guests and coaches. It’s just all around fun! I also love how they record your waves so you can really see how you surf and actually try to improve your surfing. But…that’s only 1 reason why I keep coming back. There are a million other reasons. : )
Mujeres Que Mueven is a non-profit organization in northern Nicaragua that inspires and empowers women to better self-manage their health through movement, group support, and dietary awareness. This is just one of several organizations that SWA supports in rural northern Nicaragua. We believe that travel is more meaningful when you have a chance to give back and support programs that improve the lives of locals wherever you are.
When you join a surf with amigas retreat In nicaragua, this is how you’re helping give back!
Last year SWA funded Mujeres Que Mueven’s annual nutrition challenge, and we’re proud to be funding the event again this year! The inspiring event in the village of Aserradores gives local women access to a month-long intensive program that is focused on exercise, nutrition, healthy cooking, and healthy habit forming.
Aside from the annual nutrition challenge, Mujeres Que Mueven holds exercise classes every afternoon, and each month offers one educational workshop and one women’s night. The women’s nights are built around wellness practices that include affirmations, vision boards, empowerment circles, self massage, and reiki.
MQM is empowering women in rural Northern Nicaragua to take charge of their personal wellness to lead healthier and happier lives.
At many of the monthly workshops, Nicaraguan women are invited on behalf of the organization to come to the village and teach local women about nutrition and self care. An amazing workshop was hosted in April 2022 that focused on education about the menstrual cycle and how to use menstrual cups + period panties. Over 30 cups were donated by Lenacup and MQM purchased panties to give to the women who attended. Over 25 women from the surrounding area attended and there were even families of three generations. Check out a highlight of the incredible event here.
TO LEARN MORE ABOUT MUJERES QUE MUEVEN AND HOW TO GET INVOLVED, CLICK HERE.
Surf With Amigas Founder Holly Beck has many stories to tell. She recently chatted with Coach Chris on the Kookcast podcast to about her life as a professional surfer, owner of Surf With Amigas, and surf therapy facilitator. Listen in on real conversations about women’s surfing, overcoming fear, and more.
When we’re asked to collaborate with a few inspiring women in Northern Costa Rica to support a project that elevates the reality of diverse lineups of female surfers, we immediately said YES.
Our friend Ivana + her team recently created a set of fine photography prints (soon to be transformed into a gorgeous coffee table book) that are being used to tell a different story about women’s surfing than traditional marketing tells. The project is meant to encourage girls and women around the globe to free themselves of stereotypes and limitations of their engagement in sports and recreation.
Below you can learn more about the project from Ivana herself-
After a career as a professional surfer, SWA Founder Holly Beck ran off to Central America to find herself. She built Surf With Amigas (and a family) over the course of 11 years living between Costa Rica and Nicaragua. In 2021 she decided to move back to calling California home base.
The ocean was always a place holly went to escape and find healing.
Now, she’s pursuing a Master’s in Counseling on the path to become a licensed surf therapist. She’s interning with Groundswell Community Project and partnered with Jess Ripley to create and leadsurf therapy programs in Southern California.
Q: What do you hope to accomplish in working with women in the world of holistic surf coaching?
A: After spending the last 12 years involved in surf coaching, i’ve realized that beyond the physical tips like looking down the line, putting more weight on the front foot, and all the other common bits of coaching advice that i’m typically giving Amigas, there is often a mental component as well. Whether it’s the un-helpful voice of our inner-critic, a fear of bigger waves, anxiety about getting in someone’s way, etc., there’s a lot going on in our heads that affects our surfing performance. I’ve been really interested in exploring that internal stuff both in my own life and then also adding it to a coaching program to create a more holistic approach to surf coaching that would be even more effective in the water, but also spill over into benefits to someone’s personal life as well.
Q: You’ve made a few big career changes in the past year. Looking forward, what are you most excited about?
With a gorgeous cliffside backdrop, super stylish surfer, and phenomenal videographer, this windy afternoon in Morocco was a recipe for greatness. Well, now that I think of it, the entire retreat season was destined to be great!
The retreat setup looked like this: We surfed long, peeling rights every single day, then relaxed at the luxury villa in between sessions. We explored old cities and shopped for Moroccan treasures, then slid down sand dunes at sunset. We laughed, cried, danced, and ate a TON of amazing food. For each and every one of us, it was the surf adventure of a lifetime.
Mary joined us this season at the Southern Costa Rica Longboard Surf House with a few of her closest surf friends. These ladies surfed for hours every day and reminded us that it’s never too late to just go for it and try the things you’ve always dreamed of trying.
“I’m going to turn 70 and really what I think about is that it’s time to do everything that I really want to do. There’s no time a wastin’ here.”
